You've Got Mail

Q: What's the secret to telling a good postman joke?
A: It's all in the delivery

Beach Genie

Two guys are in a locker room when one guy notices the other guy has a cork in his ass. He says, "How'd you get a cork in your ass?" The other guy says, "I was walking along the beach and I tripped over a lamp. There was a puff of smoke, and then a red man in a turban came oozing out. He said, "I am Tonto, Indian Genie. I can grant-um you one wish." And I said, "No shit."

Scariest Dinosaur

Q: What is the scariest type of dinosaur?
A: A Terror-dactyle.