The Mexican Olympic Team

Q: How come Mexico never has a good Olympic team?
A: Because all of the Mexicans that can run, jump, or swim are in the U.S.A.

Ships of the Desert

Q: Why do they call camels 'ships of the desert'?
A: Because they are full of Arab semen.

Custer's Last Thoughts

The curator of an art gallery asked an artist for a painting depicting General Custer's last thoughts. Two weeks later, the artist unveiled the painting, an enormous canvas with a lovely blue lake painted in its center, with a fish leaping from the water with a shining halo around its head. On the shores of the lake were the most detailed pictures of Indians fornicating. After gazing at the painting for some time, the enraged curator demanded to know what the theme was supposed to be. The artist said, "You asked for a painting of Custer's last thoughts," he explained. "That's it. Custer was thinking, 'Holy mackerel, where did all those fucking Indians come from?'"