Direct Shot

She swings and her ball goes flying and hits a man, who immediately grabs his crotch and falls to the ground, writhing in agony. The woman runs over and says "I'm a nurse, please let me help you!" and she reaches into his pants and starts massaging his penis. The nurse asks the man "how does that feel?" He responds "that feels great! But my thumb still hurts like hell though!"

Football V Cricket Matches

Q: Why do grasshoppers not go to many football matches?
A: They prefer cricket matches!

Golf Joke

Suggestions for guys golfing or using a public bathroom; Back straight, knees bent, feet shoulder width apart. Form a loose grip. Keep your head down. Avoid a quick back-swing. Stay out of the water. Try not to hit anyone. If you are taking too long, please let others go ahead of you. Don't stand directly in front of others. Quiet please!... while others are preparing to go. Don't take extra strokes.