Dark Humor Jokes - Corpse Jokes

Hot Grandpa

Little Johnny walks into his primary school classroom one morning to be confronted by his teacher.
Teacher: "Ahh, Good Morning Johnny, and where were you yesterday?"
Johnny: "I'm sorry Miss, but my Grandpa got burnt yesterday."
Teacher: "Was he burned very bad?"
Johnny: "Yes Mam, they don't fuck around at these crematoriums you know."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Army War Game

During an Army war game, a commanding officer's jeep got stuck in the mud. The C.O. saw some men lounging around nearby and asked them to help him get unstuck. "Sorry sir," said one of the loafers, "but we've been classified dead and the umpire said we couldn't contribute in any way." The C.O. turned to his driver and said, "Go drag a couple of those dead bodies over here and throw them under the wheels to give us some traction."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Old Chatter

You know you're getting old when you tell someone you woke up with a stiffy and they think your wife died in her sleep.

Copyright © 2015 - Kiel Phillips - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Written By: KielPhillips
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