When the staff goes out after work, they talk about...

When the staff goes out after work, they talk about football or basketball. When Middle management gets together, they talk about tennis or baseball. Top management discusses golf. Conclusion: The higher up you are in management, the smaller your balls are.

Golf and Buttercups

A man was playing a game of golf. On hole 16, he hit the ball right into a field of buttercups. As honest a golfer as he normally was, he picked up the ball and laid it next to the flowerbed to avoid destroying the beautiful buttercups. A fairy came down and said "thank you for not disturbing my buttercups. For that, I shall make sure that you always have a full supply of butter." "Thank you," the golfer replied, "but where were you last week when I hit the ball into the pussywillows?"

Tiger Woods Mercedes

On a golf tour in Ireland, Tiger Woods drives his Mercedes into a petrol station in a remote part of the Irish countryside. The pump attendant who knows absolutely nothing about golf, greets him in a typical Irish manner completely unaware of who the golfing pro is.
"Top of the mornin' to yer, sir," says the attendant.
Tiger nods a quick "hello" and bends forward to pick up the nozzle. As he does so, two tees fall out of his shirt pocket onto the ground.
"What are those?", asks the attendant.
"They're called tees," replies Tiger.
"Well, what on this god's earth are dey for?" inquires the Irishman.
"They're for resting my balls on when I'm driving", says Tiger.
"The Devil you say", says the Irishman, "Mercedes thinks of everything!"