Dog Call

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs?
A: It doesn't matter, it's not going to come anyway!

Busted

Caught my wife having sex with my best friend.
She can pack her bags and get out and he's going back to the dog shelter.

Great Dane

A man goes to a bar and he ties his Great Dane up outside. About 10 minutes later a lady comes in and asks who's Great Dane is outside. "Mine" says the man. "My dog has just killed him," she says. "What breed is your dog?" he asks. "A Chihuahua," she says. "How can a Chihuahua kill a Great Dane?" "He got caught in his throat!"