String Race

Q: Who won the race between two balls of string?
A: They we're tied!

Dirty Nurse

Q: What do you call a nurse with dirty knees?
A: The head Nurse!

Misunderstood

My coworker was eating an ice cream cone on her lunch break when she caught me staring at her. "Hey what's up?" she said. "Oh nothing, it's just that I want to ask for something but I'm afraid you'll misunderstand me," I replied. "Haha don't worry, I won't," she said reassuringly.
"I wanna lick it," I said. She quickly extends the ice cream cone to me, to which I said, "I knew you'd misunderstand."