Corporate Booty Call

I bet you can increase my productivity.

Talk To Me

A guy went to a whore house and asked the lady if she had a woman that could handle 16 inches. "Hmm," said the madam. "I'm not sure. Try the first door on the right." So the guy went inside, stuck it in, and immediately heard screams. "It's too big! Take it out!" So he went to the madam. "No, really. I need someone who can handle 16 inches." "Hmm," said the madam. "Try the last door." So the guy went inside, stuck it in, and had the time of his life, surprised that there was no scream at all. In fact, he heard no sounds at all. Puzzled, he finished up and pulled out. "Talk to me, baby." "Moo."

Counter Productive Pickup Lines

1. If you and I were squirrels, I could bust a nut in your hole.
2. How do you like your eggs: fried, scrambled or fertilized?
3. My love for you is like diarrhea; I just can't hold it in.
4. If your right leg was Thanksgiving, and your left leg was Christmas, then could I meet you between the holidays?
5. How about we play lion and lion tamer? You hold your mouth open, and I'll give you the meat.