A Preacher's Sermon

A preacher phoned the city's newspaper. "Thank you very much," said he, "for the error you made when you announced my sermon topic for last Sunday. The topic I sent you was 'What Jesus Saw in A Publican.' You printed it as 'What Jesus Saw in a Republican' I had the biggest crowd of the year!"

Adam Greeting

Q:  What did Adam say on the day before Christmas ?
A:  It's Christmas, Eve !

Iraqi TV Guide

Iraqi TV Guide:

MONDAY

8:00 - Husseinfeld
8:30 - Mad About Everything
9:00 - Suddenly Sanctions
9:30 - Allah McBeal
TUESDAY

8:00 - Wheel of Fortune and Terror
8:30 - The Price is Right if Saddam Says it's Right
9:00 - Children are Forbidden to Say The Darndest Things
9:30 - Iraq's Funniest Public Execution Bloopers
WEDNESDAY

8:00 - Buffy the Yankee Imperialist Dog Slayer
8:30 - Diagnosis: Heresy
9:00 - Just Shoot Me
9:30 - Veilwatch
THURSDAY

8:00 - Mahatma Loves Chachi
8:30 - M*U*S*T*A*S*H
9:00 - Veronica's Closet Full of Long, Black, Shapeless Dresses
9:30 - My Two Baghdads
FRIDAY

8:00 - Judge Saddam
8:30 - Captured Iranian Soldiers Say The Darndest Things
9:00 - Achmed's Creek
9:30 - No-witness News