Professional Lemon Picker

Sally Mullihan of Coral Springs, Florida decided to take one of the jobs that most Americans are not willing to do. The woman applying for a job in a Florida lemon grove seemed to be far too qualified for the job. She had a liberal arts degree from the University of Michigan and had worked as a social worker and school teacher. The foreman frowned and said, "I have to ask you, have you had any actual experience in picking lemons?" "Well, as a matter of fact, I have! I've been divorced three times, owned 2 Chryslers and voted for Obama."

George Bush Slogans

Top George Bush Slogans

• I'll turn capital punishment into a new game show!
• I promise to get cocaine off our streets: 1 kilo at a time.
• I'll finish what Bill started -- the interns.
• Like father, like son. You liked my dad, right?
• Vote for the GOP, Not OPP.
• I promise no sex scandal: just look at me.
• New penal plan: I won't use mine!
• Read my lips: Al Gore Sucks.
• George W. Bush: No hang-ups. Just hangovers
• Vote for Bush and against Common Sense. 

Einstein, Picasso, George W. Bush to Heaven

When Einstein died and arrived at the gates of heaven, St. Peter wouldn't let him in until he proved his identity. Einstein scribbled out a couple of his equations, and was admitted into paradise.
And when Picasso died, St. Peter asked, "How do I know you're Picasso?" Picasso sketched out a couple of his masterpieces. St. Peter was convinced and let him in. When George W. Bush died, he went to heaven and met the man at the gates. "How can you prove to me you're George W. Bush?" Saint Peter said. Bush replied, "Well heck, I dont know." St. Peter says, "Well, Albert Einstein showed me his equations and Picasso drew his famous pictures. What can you do to prove you're George W. Bush?" Bush replies, "Who are Albert Einstein and Picasso?"
St. Peter says, "It must be you, George, c'mon on in."