Bitter End

Little Johnny's teacher asked him, "Johnny, give me a sentence using the words, "bitter end" in it. Little Johnny thought for a moment and replies, "Our dog chased our cat and he bitter end."

Carnival Con

A little boy goes to the carnival and steps up to the "Guess the weight" game. The man at the booth said "If I can write down your exact weight on this piece of paper you have to pay me ten dollars, but if I can't I will pay you ten dollars." The little boy agrees thinking that if the man does guess his weight correctly that he would say he weighed more or less.

Q: In the end the little boy pays the man ten dollars. How did the man win the bet?

A: The man wrote "Your exact weight" on the slip of paper.

Cheesy Bites

Q: What did the cat do when he swallowed some cheese?
A: He waited by the mouse hole with baited breath!