Peculiar Birthday Card

This blonde goes into the drugstore looking for a birthday card. She asks the clerk if they have any new and different cards -- something unusual. The clerk points her to a new card just in that day -- "Happy Birthday to the Boy who Popped My Cherry." The blonde replied, "How cool! I'll take the whole box!"

Horrible Christmas Gift

Q: What did the deaf and dumb kid get for Christmas?
A: Cancer.

Three Wise Men

In a small southern town there was a beautiful Nativity Scene that showed great skill and talent had gone into creating it. Yet one small feature bothered me. The three wise men were wearing firemen's helmets. Totally unable to come up with a reason or explanation,  I left.
At a local gas station on the edge of town, I asked the lady behind the counter about the helmets. She exploded into a rage, yelling at me, "You stupid Yankees never do read the Bible!"  I assured her that I did, but simply couldn't recall anything about firemen in the Bible.  She jerked her Bible from behind the counter, ruffled through some pages and finally jabbed her finger at a passage. Sticking it in my face she said  "See, it says right here, 'The three wise men came from afar.'"