Date Night

I had a date tonight. It was pretty sweet.
Next, I’m going to try a fig.

It Was So Tall

A man is fibbing away about how great things are in his country. Finally, he starts describing the tall buildings in his country.
"There is a building so tall, it took my friend Alex 72 hours to fall off it!" "Oh, my God!" says his friend. "Surely he must have died!" "Of course. He was without food or water for 3 days!"

Curious Pizza

A pizza was waiting in the stomach to be digested, then suddenly a whiskey came along. Pizza thought, "Okay, I'll let him pass, there's no hurry." Two minutes later another whiskey comes by and pizza let him pass too, but two minutes later when the next one got there, pizza stopped him, "What's going on out there?" it asked. "Why, there's a party going on!! It's great! They're having the most fun!!", the whiskey replied.  Pizza said,  "Great, I'll go check it out!"