Asian Cars and Women

I'm a man that likes my women like I like my cars... Asian.

Constipated Polack

A Polack was suffering from constipation, so his doctor prescribed suppositories. A week later the Pole complained to the doctor that they didn't produce the desired results. "Have you been taking them regularly?" the doctor asked. "What do you think I've been doing," the Pole said, "Shoving them up my ass?"

Gulf War Remembered!

Q: What do Baghdad and Hiroshima have in common?
A: Nothing, yet.
 
Q: What does Saddam want for Thanksgiving?
A: Turkey.
 
Q: What do Miss Muffet and Saddam Hussein have in common?
A: They both have Kurds in their Whey.
 
Q: What do Saddam Hussein and General Custer have in common?
A: They both want to know where the hell those Tomahawks are coming from!
 
Q: What is the best Iraqi job?
A: Foreign Ambassador
 
Q: How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. They can't turn them on anyway.
 
Q: How many Americans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Only one, but he does it from 30 miles away using laser targeting, and at a cost of US $8,000,000.
 
Q: "How many members of the coalition does it take to screw in a light bulb?"
A: "We are not prepared to comment on specific numbers at this time."
 
Q: Did you hear that it is twice as easy to train Iraqi fighter pilots?
A: You only have to teach them to take off.
 
Q: How do you play Iraqi bingo ?
A: B-52... F-16... A-10
 
Q: What is Iraq's national bird?
A: Duck
 
Q: What's the difference between Aeroflot and the Scud Missile?
A: Aeroflot has killed more people.
 
Q: How is Saddam like Fred Flintstone?
A: Both may look out their windows and see Rubble.
 
Q: Why does the Iraqi Navy have glass bottom boats?
A: So they can see their Air Force.
 
Q: Did you hear that Saddam Hussein won the toss?
A: He elected to receive.
 
Q: Why do all Iraqi soldiers carry a piece of sandpaper?
A: They need a map...