Simpson Opportunity

To celebrate the re-launch of the Ford Bronco, Ford used clips from the famous OJ Simpson police pursuit from 26 years earlier.  Not wanting to miss an opportunity, OJ Simpson relaunched his website hoping to capitalize on all the introduction hoopla.  
If you're looking for some Bronco nostalgia, check out www.ojsimpson.com_///_\\\

Old Never Dies

• OLD CREDIT CARDS never die, they just expire
• OLD CRICKETERS never die, they just get bowled over
• OLD CRICKETERS never die, they just get smashed for six
• OLD DANCERS never die, they just step away
• OLD DAREDEVILS never die, they just get discouraged
• OLD DEANS never die, they just lose their faculties
• OLD DENTISTS never die, they just lose their pull
• OLD DIETERS never die, they just waist away
• OLD DIVERS never die, they just extend their bottom time
• OLD DIVERS never die, they just flop
• OLD DIVERS never die, they just get board
• OLD DIVERS never die, they just lose their spring
• OLD DOCTORS never die, they just lose their patience
• OLD EDITORS do it with a red pen
• OLD ELECTRICAL ENGINEERS never die, they just have slower rise times

Constitution

I was walking in a cemetery this morning and I saw a guy hiding behind a gravestone. I said "morning." He replied, "No, just having a shit."