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Dark Humor Jokes
Pizza and a Jew
Q: What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?
A: The pizza doesn't scream when it's put into an oven.
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Seattle Divorce
If a man and a woman get married in California and move to Seattle, Washington are they still brother and sister?
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Three Morticians
There were three morticians talking about their greatest feats. The first one says, "I had this soldier who stepped on a land mine. Took me three days to get him ready for an open casket funeral!" The next guy says, "Oh yeah? I had this construction worker fall 15 stories, then he got run over by a steam roller, but I had him ready for an open casket funeral in two days!" The third guy sulks in the corner, "Man. both y'all got me beat. I had this lady parachutist who landed on the empire state building. It took me four days just to get the grin off her face."
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