Share this joke via Email (Step 2)
Share this Joke on Twitter
Registered Users Only
Registered Users Only
Get link for other Social Networks
- Home
- Popular Jokes
- New Releases
- Joke of the Day
- Browse By Category
- Browse Writers
- Contests
- Submit Joke
- Contact Us
- Info
All rights reserved.
U.S. State Jokes - California Jokes
L. A. Math Proficiency Test
The City of Los Angeles High School Math Proficiency Exam
Name:_______________________________ Gang:___________________________
1.Johnny has an AK-47 with an 80-round clip. If he misses 6 out of 10 shots and shoots 13 times at each drive-by shooting, how many drive-by shootings can he attempt before he has to reload?
2.Jose has 2 ounces of cocaine and he sells an 8-ball to Jackson for $320 and 2 grams to Billy for $85 per gram. What is the street value of the balance of the cocaine if he doesn't cut it?
3.Rufus is pimping for three girls. If the price is $65 for each trick, how many tricks will each girl have to turn so Rufus can pay for his $800-per-day crack habit?
4.Jarome want to cut his 1/2 pound of heroin to make 20% more profit. How many ounces of cut will he need?
5.Willie gets $200 for stealing a BMW, $50 for a Chevy, and $100 for a 4X4. If he has stolen 2 BMWs, 3 4X4s, how many Chevies will he have to steal to make $800?
6.Raoul is in prison for 6 years for murder. He got $10,000 for the hit. If his common law wife is spending $425 per month, how much money will be left when he gets out of prison, and how many years is he likely to get for killing the bitch that spent his money?
7.If the average spray can covers 22 square feet and the average letter is 3 square feet, how many letters can be sprayed with 3 cans of paint?
8.Hector knocked up 6 girls in his gang. There are 27 girls in the gang. What percentage of the girls in the gang has Hector knocked up?
9.Thelma can cook dinner for her 16 children for $7.50 per night. She gets $234 a month welfare for each child. If her $325 per month rent goes up 15%, how many more children should she have to keep up with her expenses?
10.Salvador was arrested for dealing crack & his bail was set at $25,000. If he pays a bail bondsman 12% and returns to Mexico, how much money will he lose by jumping bail?
- 22
- 27
- 23
Californian Bulb
Q: How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Five - one to screw it in and four to sit in the hot tub and discuss the environmental impact.
- 5
- 10
- 3
Blatant Racial Discrimination
In a kindergarten in California, a teacher asks three children what they do after recess. The teacher asks Sally what she did at recess. Sally said she played in the sandbox. The teacher says "If you can spell 'sand' on the blackboard, I'll give you a cookie." Sally spells sand and gets her cookie. The teacher then asks Tim what he did during recess. He said he played in the sandbox with Sally. The teacher says "If you can spell 'box' on the blackboard, I'll give you a cookie." He spells box and gets his cookie. The teacher then asks Mohammad what he did at recess. He said he tried to play with Sally and Tim in the sandbox, but they threw stones at him. The teacher says, "That sounds like blatant racial discrimination to me. Okay, if you can spell 'blatant racial discrimination' on the blackboard I'll give you a cookie."
- 6
- 19
- 14
