Bar Jokes

Taco Bell Dogs

The Taco Bell Chihuahua, a Doberman, and a Bulldog are in a bar having a drink, when a great looking female Collie comes up to them and says, "Whoever can say liver and cheese in a sentence can have me!"  So the Doberman says, "I love liver and cheese." The Collie replies, "That's not good enough." The Bulldog says, "I hate liver and cheese." She says, "That's not creative enough." Finally, the Chihuahua says, "Liver alone, cheese mine."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Submitted BY: jamiedawg17

Stumbling and Mumbling

A drunk stumbles out of a bar one night and passes a woman walking her dog. The man stops her and asks, "Hey where'd ya get the pig?" The woman replies, "Listen you drunken bastard, that's a dog not a pig." The man then said, "Take it easy, I was talking to the dog"

Anonymous

Apple Watch Ultra Pro

A rather confident man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment. The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?" "No," he replies, "I work for Apple and I'm testing the new Ultra Pro Watch." The intrigued woman says, "Ultra Pro? What's so special about it?" "It has new sensors and sends messages to me through my wrist" he explains. "What's it telling you now?" she asked. "Well, it says you're not wearing any panties," he said. The woman giggles and replies, "Well it must be broken then because I am wearing panties!" The man explains, "Damn thing must be an hour fast."

Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous
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