Shark Week - No Swimming

Little boy to mother: “Mommy, can I go swimming?”
Mother: “Certainly not. The sea’s too rough, there’s a terrible rip tide and a dangerous offshore current, and I’ve heard this coast is infested with jellyfish and sharks.”
Little boy: “But Daddy went swimming!”
Mother: “I know, but he has excellent life insurance.”

Whale Rx

Q: What do whales take to stay healthy?
A: Vitamin Sea

Little Johnny's Goldfish!

Little Johnny was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was doing, he politely asked, "What are you up to there, Johnny?" "Well, my goldfish died," replied Johnny tearfully, without looking up, "and I've just buried him." The neighbor was concerned, "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?" Johnny patted down the last heap of earth then replied... "That's because he's inside your cat!"