Dead Man's Booty Call

Three nurses working in a morgue discover a dead man with a hard on, the 1st Nurse says, "I can't let that go to waste," and rides him.  The 2nd Nurse does the same. The 3rd Nurse hesitates and explains she's on her period, but does him anyway. To their surprise the man sits up, wide awake. The Nurses apologize saying they thought he was dead. The man replies, "I was, but after two jump starts and a blood transfusion I feel frickin great!"

The Rubdown

A hospital patient, recovering from minor surgery, was being given an alcohol rubdown by two of the hospital's more attractive nurses. While manipulating the man's body they noted that the word "tiny" was tattooed on the head of his penis.
Some months after the man's discharge, Mary, one of the nurses, told Joan, the other, that she had dated their former patient. "How could you go out with a man that had 'tiny' tattooed on his love stick?" exclaimed Joan.
"How could I indeed!" said Mary. "It said 'tiny' when it was soft, but when aroused, it spelled: 'Tiny's Delicatessen & Catering Service. We deliver at all times, twenty-four hours a day!!!'"

Mistaken Identity

Went to a fancy dress party and everyone was dressed as either a nurse, a doctor or Freddy Krueger. When I made a comment on how unimaginative they all were, I was called "insensitive" and told to leave the hospital burns unit.