Wedding Announcement

An unmarried girl who worked in a busy office arrived one morning and began passing out big cigars and candy, both tied with blue ribbons. When asked what the occasion was, she proudly displayed a new diamond solitaire ring on her third finger, left hand, and announced..."It's a boy, six feet tall and 190 pounds!"

New Dog Breed

Q: A: Did you here about the new breed of dog?
A: It's a cross between a Pittbull and a Collie. First it bites off your leg, and then it runs for help.

Paperboy

A paperboy said to a customer one day, "Mr. Smith, I wish I had twenty customers like you." "Gosh, that's nice to hear," said Smith, "but I'm kind of surprised considering I never tip all that well and always pay late." The paperboy said, "I know, but I'd still like twenty customers like you. The problem is I have one hundred and forty!"