Name It

Q: Bush has a short one. Sarkozy has a long one. Cher does not use hers. What is it?
A: A last name.

Fight Competition

The shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST DEALS. He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his right, and announced its arrival with an even larger sign, reading LOWEST PRICES. The shopkeeper was panicked, until he got an idea. He put the biggest sign of all over his own shop-it read... Main entrance. 

God And Gay People

If God had wanted people to be gay... he would've made Adam & Steve instead of Adam & Eve.