Arizona Crazy Law

• You may not have more than two dildos in a house.
• Any misdemeanor committed while wearing a red mask is considered a felony. This goes back in the days of the Wild West.
• There is a possible 25 years in prison for cutting down a cactus.
• When being attacked by a criminal or burglar, you may only protect yourself with the same weapon that the other person possesses.
• Hunting camels is prohibited.
• Donkeys cannot sleep in bathtubs.
• It is unlawful to refuse a person a glass of water.
• Cars may not be driven in reverse.
• Cards may not be played in the street with a Native American.
• If you bother the cottontails or bullfrogs, you will be fined.
• No more than six girls may live in any house.
• It is illegal to smoke cigarettes within 15 feet of a public place unless you have a Class 12 liqueur license.
• A decree declares that anyone caught stealing soap must wash himself with it until it is all used up.
• An ordinance prohibits the wearing of suspenders.
• No one is permitted to ride their horse up the stairs of the county court house.
• Women may not wear pants.
• It is illegal for men and women over the age of 18 to have less than one missing tooth visible when smiling.

Married Football Player

Q: How can you tell if a University of Tennessee football player is married?

A: There is tobacco spit on both sides of his pickup truck.

Drunk Alaskan Ice Fishing

A drunk guy in Alaska decides to go ice fishing. He starts sawing a hole in the ice, when a loud booming voice says, "You will find no fish there." The drunk looks up, ignores it, and continues on. The voice booms again, "You will find no fish under the ice." The drunk looks up and says, "God, is that you?" The voice says, "No, I'm the manager of this ice rink."