Seven Dwarfs Classic

Six of the seven dwarfs are sitting around the house one day when Sleepy rushes in and says, "Guess what guys, I've won a trip to see the Pope!" Everyone gets all excited and chants, "We finally get to ask him, we finally get to ask him." The next day, they are standing in front of the Pope, Dopey out in front of the other six. All the other six start pushing Dopey and saying, "Go ahead, Dopey, ask him, ask him!" The Pope looks at Dopey and asks, "Do you have a question to ask me, young man?" Dopey looks up shyly and says, "Well, yes." The Pope tells him to go ahead and ask. Dopey asks, "Well, do.... do they have nuns in Alaska?"T he Pope replies, "Well, yes, I'm sure we have nuns in Alaska." The others all keep nudging Dopey and chanting, "Ask him the rest, Dopey, ask him the rest!" The Pope asks Dopey if there's more to his question, and Dopey continues, "Well, uh, do they have, uh, black nuns in Alaska?" To which the Pope replies, "Well, my son, I think there must be a few black nuns in Alaska, yes." Still not satisfied, the others keep saying, "Ask him the last part, Dopey, ask him the last part!" The Pope asks Dopey, "Is there still more to your question?"T o which Dopey replies, "Well, uh, yeah..... are there, uh, are there any midget black nuns in Alaska?" The startled Pope replies, "Well, no, my son, I really don't think there are any midget black nuns in Alaska." At this, Dopey turns all kinds of colors, and the others start laughing, and yelling... "Dopey screwed a penguin, Dopey screwed a penguin!"

History of Louisiana Property

One of the best examples of how ridiculous government paperwork can be is illustrated by a recent case in Louisiana. A company president was trying to buy some land in Louisiana for a plant expansion, and he wanted to finance this new facility with a government loan. His lawyer filled out all the necessary forms, including the abstract -- tracing the title to the land back to 1803. The government reviewed his application and abstract and sent the following reply: 'We received today your letter enclosing application for your client supported by abstract of title. We have observed, however, that you have not traced the title previous to 1803, and before final approval, it will be necessary that the title be traced previous to that year. Yours truly.' As a result, the lawyer sent the following letter to the government: 'Gentlemen, your letter regarding title received. I note you wish title to be claimed back further than I have done it. 'I was unaware that any educated man failed to know that Louisiana was purchased by the United States from France in 1803. The title of the land was acquired by France by right of conquest of Spain. The land came into possession of Spain in 1492 by right of discovery by a Spanish-Portugese sailor named Christopher Columbus, who had been granted the privilege of seeking a new route to India by Queen Isabella. 'The good queen, being a pious woman and careful about title, took the precaution of securing the blessing of the Pope of Rome upon Columbus' voyage before she sold her jewels to help him. 'Now the Pope, as you know, is the emissary of Jesus Christ, who is the Son of God. And God made the world. Therefore, I believe it is safe to assume that He also made that part of the United States called Louisiana, and I now hope you're satisfied.' 

Knock Knock - Texas

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Texas!
Texas who?
Texas are getting higher every year!