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Sex Jokes - Masturbation Jokes
Literal Actions
Two polish guys walk into a bar and sit down on the stools. All of a sudden, they start masturbating furiously, until the bar owner comes along and screams, "HEY, what the FUCK are you guys doing?! " One of the guys says, "The sign says: FIRST COME, FIRST SERVE!"
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Vasectomy Clinic
Two guys have 9 a.m. appointments at a vasectomy clinic. A young nurse preps them for surgery. She tells the first guy to take off his clothes and sit on an exam table. Then, she takes his manhood in her hands and masturbates him. She tells him that it is standard procedure to make sure there are no blockages. Once done, the nurse tells him to sit down and repeats her instructions to the second guy. When he is on the exam table, the nurse gives him a blow job. Upon seeing this, the first guy says, "That's not fair. Why does he get a blow job?" The nurse says, "Sorry, that's the difference between Blue Cross and an HMO."
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Good News, Bad News, Worse News
Good: Your son studies a lot in his room
Bad: You find several porn movies hidden there
Worse: You're in them
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