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Relationship Jokes - Dating Jokes
The Rubdown
A hospital patient, recovering from minor surgery, was being given an alcohol rubdown by two of the hospital's more attractive nurses. While manipulating the man's body they noted that the word "tiny" was tattooed on the head of his penis.
Some months after the man's discharge, Mary, one of the nurses, told Joan, the other, that she had dated their former patient. "How could you go out with a man that had 'tiny' tattooed on his love stick?" exclaimed Joan.
"How could I indeed!" said Mary. "It said 'tiny' when it was soft, but when aroused, it spelled: 'Tiny's Delicatessen & Catering Service. We deliver at all times, twenty-four hours a day!!!'"
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Boyfriend And Husband
Q: What is the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes.
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Three of Us
A couple of years ago, I was about to propose to my girlfriend when my new roommate Joe barged into the room from nowhere, tripped and broke the glass table with his face. It totally ruined the moment. I didn't know Joe that well, didn't know where he was from, but i put my proposal on hold just to help him with his injuries.
Joe had shards of glass removed from his eye. He was walking around with one of those cotton pads on his eye for a couple of months. Then suddenly, he disappeared along with my girlfriend.
Apparently they bonded during the time he was recovering and had eloped together, leaving me behind without even a note. I tried tracking them down, but to no avail.
In conclusion, if it hadn't been for the cotton eye Joe, I'd have been married a long time ago. Where did you come from, where did you go? Where did you come from, cotton eye Joe?
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