Dr. Wong

A woman goes to a doctor named Dr. Wong. "Doctor, I can't get a date, no one will go out with me!"  In a very thick Asian accent, Dr. Wong says, "Take off clothes and get on all four hands and knees." She does. "Now crawl to wall." She does so and looks back at him. "I know what wrong." “What is it Doctor! What do I have?" "You have Ed Zachary disease." "Ed Zachary disease? What is that?!" "You face look Ed Zachary like you ass!"

Marriage Request

A guy falls in love with a very traditional and conservative girl. That means no sex before marriage. But he doesn't care, he loves her. After a year of dating he decides its time to propose to her. So he heads to her father's house to ask for his blessing.
"Hello, sir, I'm here to ask for your daughter's hand"
A bit skeptical and looking to see if he really does love her, the father asks "And why is that?"
The guy lets out a long drawn out sigh... "Well, its just that mine have gotten tired."