Wrong Finger

I saw my old girlfriend the other day and she had her wedding ring on the wrong finger.  When I pointed this out to her, she said, "I know, I married the wrong man!"

Bookworm

"For Heaven's sake, Chris, why can't you talk to me once in a while?", Julie whined. "What?", Chris replied. "Look around!", Julie yelled, as she pointed around the room. "Look at all these books! You always have your head buried in a book! You don't even seem to know I'm alive!" "I'm sorry, honey," Chris said. "Sometimes I wish I were a book. Maybe then you'd at least look at me!" Julie exclaimed. "Hmmmm," Chris mumbled, "that's not such a bad idea. Then I could take you to the library every few days and change you for something more interesting."

Save The Country

A woman shows up at the white house in a trench coat and scarf and says, "I received your emergency phone call, Mrs. Clinton, and came right away, but what could "I" possibly do to save the country?" Mrs. Clinton said "Come inside and let me explain, Mrs. Bobbit..."