Jump Out of the Plane

An Englishman, Frenchman, Mexican, and Texan were flying across country on a small plane when the pilot comes on the loud speaker and says, "We're having mechanical problems and the only way we can make it to the next airport is for 3 of you to open the door and jump. At least one of you will survive."  The four open the door and look out below.  The Englishman takes a deep breath and hollers, "God Save The Queen," and jumps.  The Frenchman gets really inspired and hollers, "Viva La France," and he also jumps.  This really pumps up the Texan so he hollers, "Remember the Alamo," and he grabs the Mexican and throws him out of the plane.

Yo Mama - Back Flips

Yo mama so short she does back flips under the bed.

German Clock Maker

Q: What did the German clockmaker say to the clock that only went 'tick, tick,tick'?
A: 'Ve haff vays of making you tock!'