Sweet Strategy

I've developed a foolproof way of getting maximum candy this Halloween. Dress as a Jehovah's Witness and say "Do you have a few minutes to talk about God or treat"

Viking Booty Call

Normally I'd be raping and pillaging, but you make me want to be a better man.

Social Tips For Rednecks

1. Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them.
2. It's considered tacky to take a cooler to church.
3. If you have to vacuum the bed, it's time to change the sheets.
4. Even if your certain that you're included in the will, it's rude to drive a U-Haul to the funeral.