Very Bad Private Eye

The Top Signs That You've Hired A Bad Private Eye

• Considers reading "The Hardy Boys Mysteries" actually helpful research.
• He has a pet basset hound named "Flash" that acts as his trusty assistant.
• His best disguise is wearing a hat.
• Keeps getting confused and follows you all the time.
• Won't read any messages without his trusty decoder ring.
• Dresses up like Jessica Fletcher from "Murder She Wrote" when he thinks he's caught the suspect.
• Well, he's blind.

Alien Booty Call

The next planet on my tour of this galaxy is Uranus.

Here Chicken Chicken

Q: Where is the world's fastest chicken from?
A: Ethiopia!