Dry Cow

Q: What do you call a cow who gives no milk?
A: A milk dud.

Banana Threads

Q: What did the banana say about his clothing?
A: I find this attire appeeling

Older and Better

For his wife's birthday party, a doctor ordered a cake with this inscription: "You are not getting older, You are just getting better."
When asked how he wanted it arranged, he said, "Just put 'You are not getting older' at the top, and 'You are just getting better' at the bottom."
It wasn't until the good doctor was ready to serve the cake that he discovered it read :"YOU ARE NOT GETTING OLDER AT THE TOP, YOU ARE JUST GETTING BETTER AT THE BOTTOM."