Jokes about Families - Mother Jokes

Phone For Texas Aggie

Soon after the Texas Aggie clocked in for work, the foreman called him over and told him that he had a phone call in the front office. When the Aggie returned, he had a mournful expression on his face and his head hung low. His foreman noticed and asked if he had received bad news. "Shure was, Boss" he replied, "I just found out that my mother died earlier this morning." "Gosh, that's awful," replied the foreman "Do you want the rest of the day off?" "No," replied the Aggie. "I'll finish the day out." About an hour later, the foreman returned to inform him that there was another phone call for him up front. This time when the Aggie returned he looked twice as glum and the foreman asked if everything was alright. "Jezz, Boss this has to be the worst day of my life," Moaned the Aggie. "That was my brother, and his mother died today too!"

Categories: Dark Humor Jokes (Death Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Brother Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Mother Jokes) , Redneck Jokes
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Lost at Krogers

There's a very sad Muslim kid, standing alone in Krogers and crying because he can't find his mother.
A kind store attendant bends over and asks, "Honey, it's going to be alright.  We'll find your mom.  Tell me, what does your mother look like?"
The kid replied, "I have no fucking idea."

Categories: Religion Jokes (Muslim Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Mother Jokes)
Anonymous

Amish Heat

An Amish woman and her daughter were riding in an old buggy one cold blustery day. The daughter said to her mother, "My hands are freezing cold." The mother replied, "Put them between your legs. Your body heat will warm them up." The daughter did, and her hands warmed up.
The next day the daughter was riding with her boy friend who said, "My hands are freezing cold." The girl replied, "Put them between my legs. The warmth of my body will warm them up." He did, and warmed his hands.
The following day the boyfriend was again in the buggy with the daughter. He said, "My nose is cold." The girl replied "Put it between my legs. The warmth of my body will warm it up." He did, and warmed his nose.
The next day the boyfriend was again driving with the daughter, and he said, "My penis is frozen solid."
The following day the daughter was driving in the buggy with her mother again, and she says to her mother, "Have you ever heard of a penis?" Slightly concerned the mother said, "Why, yes. Why do you ask?" The daughter replies, "They make one hell of a mess when they defrost, don't they!"

Categories: Jokes about Families (Daughter Jokes) , Jokes about Families (Mother Jokes) , Weather Jokes (So Cold Here Jokes) , Sex Jokes , Sex Jokes (Private Parts)
Anonymous
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