Alien Laws

A Californian and an Texan were deer hunting in the brush of south Texas when an illegal alien runs across a clearing. The Texan takes careful aim, shoots and kills him. "You can't do that!" cried the Californian. "It's legal here in Texas " replies the Texan.
Later that night the Californian goes to town to buy some beer from Walmart. He puts the beer on the roof of his truck and while he's making room behind the seat, an illegal alien runs by, grabs the beer and runs away. The Californian draws his pistol, shoots and kills him. As he is retrieving his beer the police come and arrest him.
"But I thought it was legal to shoot illegal aliens here in Texas!" protests the Californian. "Well, yeah," says the cop, "but you can't use bait."

Mexican Vampire

Q: What did the Mexican vampire say on Halloween?
A: I Juan to suck your blood!

Defense Arts

A Japanese, Korean and Mexican man were discussing their favorite type of martial arts. Japanese man: I practice karate, the defense art. Korean man: I practice Taekwondo, the art of defense and attack. Mexican man: I practice Judono. The other two ask: We have heard of Judo but not Judono, what is it?
Mexican: Well, judono if I got a gun, judono if I got a knife...