Pub Fishing

It was raining hard and a big puddle had formed in front of the little Irish pub. An old man stood beside the puddle holding a stick with a string on the end and jiggled it up and down in the water. A curious gentleman asked what he was doing. “Fishing”, replied the old man. Poor old fool, thought the gentlemen. So, he decided he would invite the old man to have a drink in the pub. Feeling he should start some conversation while they were sipping their whisky, the gentleman asked, “And, how many have you caught today?” 
“You're the sixth,” he answered.

Paddy's Mother-in-Law

The mother-in-law arrives home from the shops to find her son-in-law, Paddy, in a steaming rage and hurriedly packing his suitcase.
"What happened Paddy ?" she asks anxiously.
"What happened!! I'll tell you what happened. I sent an email to my wife telling her I was coming home today from my fishing trip. I get home... and guess what I found? Yes, your daughter, my wife Jean, naked with Joe Murphy in our marital bed!  This is unforgivable, the end of our marriage. I'm done. I'm leaving forever!"
"Ah now, calm down, calm down Paddy!" says his mother-in-law. "There is something very odd going on here. Jean would never do such a thing! There must be a simple explanation. I'll go speak to her immediately and find out what happened."
Moments later, the mother-in-law comes back with a big smile. "Paddy. I told you there must be a simple explanation .....she never got your e-mail!" 

Polish Gold Medal Winners

Q: Hear what the Poles did with all their gold medals?
A: Went home and got them bronzed.