Wanna Hear A Polish Joke?

Guy walks into a bar, sits downs and starts to make conversation with guy at next table. "Want to hear the worlds's worst Polish Joke?" Other guy says "Sure, but before you tell it, let me tell you something. See those two bikers over there by the door-real mean motherfuckers. They're Polish. And those two bouncers by the bar? They're Polish too! The Bartender?? Polish!! And one more thing pal, I'm Polish too!!! Now..... still want to tell that joke?" "Hell no!", replies First Guy, "I don't want to have to explain it 6 times!"

Giovanni and Lothario

It is Renaissance Italy and Lothario and his friend Giovanni sit at a table outside a cafe in Venice. Lothario enjoys his coffee while Giovanni, obviously depressed, sits staring into his. Lothario notices that Giovanni is upset and asks, "Giovanni, why are you so depressed?" Giovanni looks at him and says, "Lothario, you see this canal we sit beside, this beautiful Venician canal? I Giovanni designed and built this canal. Do they call me Giovanni the canal builder? No they do not." Giovanni points to a bridge a short way from the cafe. "You see that bridge Lothario? I, Giovanni, designed and built that beautiful bridge and many others like it, but do they call me Giovanni the bridge builder? No they do not" Giovanni then gestures at the buildings that surround them "These houses, these beautiful houses of Venice. I, Giovanni designed and built these houses and do they call me Giovanni the house builder? No they do not. But I screw one sheep..."

Redneck GI's in India..

Two mountain bred GIs were wandering the streets of Calcutta when an old woman walked by. "Hey, Billy Joe," one said, "I think that's Mother Teresa." "Your nuts." "I'm telling you." They approached the woman and one asked, "Are you Mother Teresa?" The old lady eyed them scornfully. "Fuck off, you goddamn perverts," she hissed, striding off. "Jeez," Billy Joe said, watching her disappear into the crowd, "now we'll never know."