Hellen Keller - Skydiving

Q: Why did Hellen Keller stop skydiving?
A: It was hell on the seeing eye dog!

Tongue Workout

Stick your tongue out. Move it up and down. Relax. Now move it left and right. Well done! You have just completed Christopher Reeves' workout video.

Selling to a Farmhouse

A traveling salesman approached an old farmhouse and noticed the strange behavior of the couple inside. The woman was running the lawn mower over the carpet and the man had one hand dipped in a fish bowl and was playing with himself with the other. The salesman assumed they were crazy and moved on. After he'd finished his pitch at the next farmhouse, he mentioned what he'd just seen. ''Oh, those folks ain't crazy,'' the farmer said, ''They're both deaf mutes. She was telling him to mow the lawn, and he was telling her to go fuck herself because he was going fishing.''