Dead Kitten

A little boy was visiting his grandparents on their farm and became attached to one of the kittens. This kitten, having no road sense, was killed by a passing car right in front of the little boy. The grandfather buried the kitten behind the barn, and the grandmother distracted the boy by giving him cookies and milk. While the little boy was eating, the following conversation took place. "Grandma, what happened to the kitten?" "It was killed by a car. The kitten is dead." "Where does a kitten go when it dies?" "God takes the kitten to heaven." The little boy took another bite of cookie and then said, "But, Grandma, what does God want with a dead kitten?"

Steve Jobs

Q: What's the difference between cancer and the middle class?
A: At least cancer got Jobs.

Cheating Man

A man cheats on his girlfriend named Lorraine with a girl named Clearly. Suddenly, Lorraine died. At the funeral, the man stands up and sings, "I can see Clearly now, Lorraine is gone."