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Death Jokes - Funny Death Jokes - Death Jokes One Liners - Jokerz

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The best jokes and joke writers!

Wearing Suits

Q: Where do black people wear suits?

A: Courts & coffins

Wedding Tombstones

A husband and his wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary.

The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads: 'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever'."

"Yeah," she replies, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone reads: 'Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last.'"

Boy & Grandpa

A little boy comes running Into the room and says, "Grandpa! Grandpa! Can you make a sound like a frog?" The Grandpa says, "I don't know, why?"

The little boy says, "Because grandma says as soon as you croak, we can go to Disneyland!"

The Big Jump

Q: OK, there's a smart blonde, a brunette, and Santa Claus on top of the Empire State Building. If they all jump off at the same time, who will hit the ground first?

A: The brunette, because the other two don't exist!

Graveyard Hair Salon

Q: What was the name of the hair salon next to the graveyard?

A: "Curl Up and Dye."