First Time Super Bowl

A guy finally got tickets to the Super Bowl, but his seats were in the nosebleed section -- but he didn't care, he had always dreamed of going to the Super Bowl. So he wants to find a seat closer to where he can see better. He finds this seat toward the front and he asks the guy next to it whether anyone is sitting there. The guy replies, "No, because my wife just died." "Well," says the first man, "why didn't you just bring a friend or relative?" The guy replied, "Oh, they're all at the funeral."

Frank Sinatra

Experts say that although Frank Sinatra is dead, his act is still 150% more entertaining than Frank Sinatra Jr.'s.

Smelling the Last Supper

As Sam laid on his death bed, his wife and children gathered around him. Suddenly, the aroma of chopped liver filled the room. Sam perked up a bit and said to his wife, "That's it, one last time before I die, I must have some of your delicious chopped liver!" Sam's wife sheepishly looked at him sadly and said, "Sorry Sam, it's for after."