A Famous Surgeon on Safari in Africa

A famous surgeon went on a safari in Africa. When he came back, his colleagues asked him how it had been. "Oh, it was very disappointing," he said. "I didn't kill a thing. I'd have been better off staying here in the hospital!"

Insurance Salesman Technique

Life Insurance Agent: "Don't let me frighten you into a decision. Sleep on it tonight, and if you wake up in the morning, let me know what you think.

Anything You Need?

Trying to contact her dead husband, Edna goes to a psychic who tells her that her husband is fine and looking forward to their reunion. “Is there anything he needs?” asks Edna. The psychic replies, “He says he’d love a pack of cigarettes.” “Oh,” says Edna. “And did he say where I should try to send them?” “No,” replies the psychic. “But then again, he didn’t ask for any matches.”