Bar Jokes - Animal in Bar Jokes

Ostrich & Pussy Cat

A man walked into a pub with an ostrich and a pussy cat.
He walked up the the bar and said "Beer for me, beer for the ostrich, whiskey for the cat."
They found a table, sat down and drank their drinks. After they finished their drinks, it was the ostrich's turn to buy a round.
The ostrich walked up to the bar and said "Beer for me, beer for the man, whiskey for the cat."
He took the drinks back to the table and they drank them. When it was the cat's turn to buy, he told them "Fuck off!"
So the man went back to the bar and said "Beer for me, beer for the ostrich and whiskey for the cat."
The Barman was curious about this and said "I notice that you and the ostrich have both bought a round, but the cat hasn't. Why is this?".
The man replied, "I helped a little old lady across the road, and she turned out to be my Fairy Godmother. She granted me one wish."
"What did you wish for?" asked the Barman.
"I wished for a long legged bird with a tight pussy!"

Categories: Bar Jokes (Animal in Bar Jokes) , Bar Jokes (Walks Into a Bar) , Animal Jokes (Bird Jokes) , Animal Jokes (Cat Jokes) , Sex Jokes (Private Parts)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Anonymous

Bartender's Free Drink

A dog walks into a bar and hops up on a stool. He looks the bartender in the eye and says, "Hey, guess what? I can talk. Have you ever seen a talking dog before? How about a drink?" The bartender thinks for a moment and says, "Sure, the toilet's right around the corner."

Categories: Bar Jokes (Animal in Bar Jokes)
Anonymous

Three Pigs in a Bar

There were three little pigs. The first pig went to a bar, ordered a drink, gulped it down, went to the bathroom, and then left. The second pig went to the same bar, ordered a drink, gulped it down, went to the bathroom, and then left. The third pig went to the same bar, ordered a drink, gulped it down, and was just going to leave when the bartender asked if he was going to the bathroom.  The third little pig replied, “No, I’m the little pig that goes weee weee weee all the way home.”

Categories: Animal Jokes (Pig Jokes) , Bar Jokes (Animal in Bar Jokes)
Copyright © 2013 - All Rights Reserved - Used with Permission.
Submitted BY: lesvuoso27
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