Harambe at MadTree

Harambe and a friend walk into the taproom at MadTree Brewing in Cincinnati. After quite a few drinks, Harambe asks for a final mug of Happy Amber, his favorite brew. His friend says, "Dude, you've had too much today. Just get some ice to suck on for a while until we leave." Harambe nods his agreement, and the bartender says, "So, just ice?"
His friend says, "Yep, just ice for Harambe."

Three Pigs in a Bar

There were three little pigs. The first pig went to a bar, ordered a drink, gulped it down, went to the bathroom, and then left. The second pig went to the same bar, ordered a drink, gulped it down, went to the bathroom, and then left. The third pig went to the same bar, ordered a drink, gulped it down, and was just going to leave when the bartender asked if he was going to the bathroom.  The third little pig replied, “No, I’m the little pig that goes weee weee weee all the way home.”

A Duck Walks Into A Bar

A Duck walks into a bar,
Duck: You got any bread?
Barman: No, sorry, we don't have any bread [After a few minutes]
Duck: You got any bread?
Barman: Look, we don't have any bread [In a little while]
Duck: You got any bread?
Barman: We don't have any fucking bread!
Duck: Got any bread?
Barman: If you ask me if I've got any fucking bread once more I'm gonna nail your fucking bill to this bar.
Duck: You got any nails?
Barman: NO!
Duck: You got any bread?