Canine Complex

A man walked into the office of the eminent psychiatrist Dr. Heidberg, and sat down to explain his problem. "Doctor, doctor! I've got this problem," the man said. "I keep hallucinating that I'm a dog. It's crazy. I don't know what to do!" "A common canine complex," said the doctor soothingly. "Relax. Come here and lie down on the couch." "Oh no, Doctor," the man said nervously, "I'm not allowed up on the furniture."

When Its Cold Outside

Q: How do you know when it is cold outside?
A: When your dog's dick is frozen to the fire hydrant.

Uni Zoo

A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog. It was a Shih Tzu.