A Real Bastard

A little boy is standing at the side of a river, weeping. His tears are streaming down his cheeks. An elderly lady passes by and feels pity for him. "What is the matter, young boy? Why are you crying?" "It's mean!", the boy sniffed, "My daddy drowned all four little kittens we had yesterday!" "That's awful indeed!", the lady replied angrily, "Your father is a real bastard!' "Yes", said the little boy, "He had promised to me that I could do it."

New Way To Herd Cattle

The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.
Wednesday, October 21, 1992, A Japanese rancher told reporters in Tokyo in July that he herds cattle by outfitting them with pocket pagers (beepers), which he calls from his portable phone. After a week of training, the cows associate the beeping with eating and hustle up for grub.

Swan Dance

Q:  What do baby swans dance to?
A: Cygnet-ure-tunes!