Share this joke via Email (Step 2)
Share this Joke on Twitter
Registered Users Only
Registered Users Only
Get link for other Social Networks
- Home
- Popular Jokes
- New Releases
- Joke of the Day
- Browse By Category
- Browse Writers
- Contests
- Submit Joke
- Contact Us
- Info
All rights reserved.
Alcohol Jokes - Shots Jokes
MasterCard for Men
Cover charge: $15.00
Round of drinks: $23.00
Table dance: $30.00
Another round of drinks: $23.00
Couch dance, with tips: $50.00
A round of shots: $34.00
Private dance in your hotel room: $300.00
Send her on her way and never have to hear her complain: Priceless.
There are some things that money can't buy. For everything else, there's MasterCard.
- 2
- 6
- 3
Oscar's Drinking Game
Q: How do you play the new Oscar Pistorius drinking game?
A: Every time your girlfriend goes to the bathroom, you take 5 shots.
- 1
- 12
- 10
15 Signs You Drank Too Much
15. You spent Sunday night in jail for cow-tipping... with your Oldsmobile.
14. Although armed with fire extinguishers, friends stood at a safe distance as you blew out your birthday candles.
13. Thanks to you, Jack Daniels stock is up 15 1/4 since Friday.
12. Boris Yeltsin called personally to ask you to slow down on the Stoli.
11. For some reason, there's salt on the rim of your basketball goal.
10. Your name is Otis and Sheriff Andy has brought you some of Aunt Bea's pancakes.
9. For the money you spent on Thunderbird, you could've bought the automobile.
8. You're now the proud inventor of the "Slim Jim": Ultra Slim-Fast shakes made with Jim Beam.
7. Answering machine full of warnings from Coach Switzer.
6. Absolut wants to run an ad featuring a picture of your liver in the shape of a bottle.
5. Yet again, dry cleaner employees greet you with, "Hey, it's Vomit Man!"
4. The doorman asks for your I.D. just to see how long it'll take you to find your pants.
3. Your liver, in a fit of pique, leaps out of your abdominal cavity into a pan of frying onions.
2. Worried friends call Monday morning to make sure you returned the goat.
1. You're now sober enough to realize "Drink Canada Dry" is a slogan and not a personal challenge.
- 0
- 2
- 1
