Alcohol Jokes

A Real Woman

A real woman is a man's best friend.  She will never stand him up and never let him down.  She will reassure him when he feels insecure and comfort him after a bad day.  She will inspire him to do things he never thought he could do; to live without fear and forget regret.  She will enable him to express his deepest emotions and give in to his most intimate desires.  She will make sure he always feels as thought he's the most handsome man in the room and will enable him to be the most confident, sexy, seductive and invincible....
No wait....SORRY.  I was thinking of whiskey.  It's whiskey that does all that shit.  Never mind....

Categories: Relationship Jokes (Man Criticizes Woman) , Alcohol Jokes (Whiskey Jokes)
Anonymous

Hitler Abstains

Q: Why didn't Hitler drink tequila?
A: Cause it made him mean.

Categories: Funny Thoughts , Riddles , Alcohol Jokes (Tequila Jokes)
Anonymous

Good Bud

Q: What's the difference between men and beer?
A: When you're done with the beer it's still worth 5 cents.

Categories: Alcohol Jokes (Beer Jokes) , Funny Thoughts , Riddles , Relationship Jokes (Break-up Jokes) , Relationship Jokes (Woman Criticizes Man)
Anonymous
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