Private Briefing

When the formal private briefing of the attractive new teacher, by the vice-principal was finished, the vice-principal took a few puffs on his pipe and said, "I have an informal piece of advice for you, Miss Bell. There's only one way you can get along in this school without submitting to the sexual advances of the principal." "Oh my God! Well, er, what was is that?" "I'll explain it, " he continued, "as soon as you've undressed."

Grown Up Words

A teacher was teaching a class of five year olds and asked what they all did in the summer holidays. One boy said he got a ''choo-choo.'' The teacher said, "Please use the proper grown-up word for what you have done. The word is train." Another boy said he got a ''bow-wow.'' The teacher said please use the proper grown-up word for what you have done. The word is dog." Another boy said I got a ''Winnie the Shit.''

Public School Teacher Arrested

At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual, later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator.