Practice makes Perfect

My Lesbian neighbors Jill and Julie, who are both teachers, asked me to help them conceive a child.
They said they wouldn't mind if we did it the old-fashioned way as they weren't man-haters.
For six months now we've been trying but I just don't have the heart to tell them that I had a vasectomy last year.

Down the Stairs

Q: How many cops does it take to push a black man down the stairs?
A: None - "He fell".

Exchange Rates

I was at my bank today waiting in a short line. There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady, who was trying to exchange yen for dollars. It was obvious she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla of yen. Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?" The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations." The Asian lady says, "Fluc you white people too!"