Motorcycle Crash

I looked out of my window in horror yesterday as a crowd gathered around a crashed motorcyclist. I rushed outside yelling, "Let me through, let me through" A man at the front said, "Thank God for that, are you a Doctor"?
I said "No, that's my fucking Pizza"

Doctor's Notes

A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room, when a young woman with purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of tattoos, and wearing strange clothing, entered. It was quickly determined that the patient had acute appendicitis, so she was scheduled for immediate surgery. When she was completely disrobed on the operating table, the staff noticed that her pubic hair had been dyed green, and above it there was a tattoo that read, "Keep off the grass." Once the surgery was completed, the surgeon wrote a short note on the patient's dressing, which said, "Sorry, had to mow the lawn."

Cowboy Die With Boots On

Q: Why did the cowboy die with his boots on?
A: Because he didn't want to stub his toe when he kicked the bucket!